Poor needy pathetic desperate Jen

How did Jennifer Aniston, once America’s Sweetheart, morph into America’s Spinster?

by Anne Kingston on Thursday, November 20, 2008 7:59am - 75 Comments

Poor needy pathetic desperate Jen

Vogue editor Anna Wintour knows how to sell magazines, which explains the “What Angelina Did Was Very Uncool” line on the cover of the December issue next to Jennifer Aniston’s face. The quote was lifted from an interview in which the former Friends star was asked about Angelina Jolie’s gushing to the magazine in 2007 about falling in love with Brad Pitt while he was still hitched to her. Playing Aniston’s first public comment about Jolie so boldly was a master stroke destined to generate epic buzz.

For Aniston, though, the incident ushered in yet another of the “Poor Jen! Duped again!” moments that have dogged her since her 2005 divorce from Pitt. Not only did Vogue exploit Aniston’s tepid smackdown, making her appear obsessed with the siren who stole her husband, it squared the two women off against one another more subtly. Astute fashionistas were quick to note that the cover image of Aniston posed on a beach in a cleavage-displaying, off-the-shoulder, red Narciso Rodriguez gown echoed the cover shot of Jolie in January 2007 in which she rocked a cleavage-displaying, off-the-shoulder, red Bill Blass against a sandy backdrop. Jolie’s cover line, however, was a more triumphant “Why Her Real Life is More Romantic Than Any Movie.” The disparity continued inside: in 2007, Jolie was shown with Pitt and their numerous children; in the current issue, Aniston is pictured with her dog Norman.

Aniston’s Vogue appearance is part of a publicity blitz for her two new movies, Marley & Me, which opens on Dec. 25, and He’s Just Not That Into You, which arrives in February. Neither role, it’s safe to say, will eclipse the one she currently plays in the cultural imagination—that of the archetypal Wronged Wife subject to an endless loop of “Jen Is Devastated!” “Jen Is Furious!” “Jen Gets Revenge!” bogus theorizing. Since her divorce, America’s Sweetheart has morphed into America’s Spinster. The unmarried, childless Aniston has become the tabloids’ Miss Havisham, portrayed as lonely, needy and locked in the past. The website Dlisted.com recently advertised a US$19.95 “Boyfriend Arm Pillow” thus: “Now, every time the Jennifer Aniston in your life calls you, wanting to whine for hours about how they are so f–king lonely and their cats are even giving them the side-eye, you can simply say, ‘Aniston in my life, go canoodle with the Boyfriend Arm Pillow I got you for Christmas.’ ” Celebrity gossip site PerezHilton.com refers to her cruelly as “Maniston.”

Her alleged tribulations sell big time. “We can’t get enough of her,” says Dina Sansing, entertainment director at US Weekly, where every issue features at least one Aniston photo or story. She’s No. 2 on the “Most Valuable Celebrity Faces” of 2008 list in terms of newsstand sales, according to Forbes. (In a rare case of tabloids imitating life, “Poor Jen!” was knocked off her No. 1 perch this year by Jolie.) Women relate to her, says Sansing, a bond that dates back to 1994 when Aniston entered homes as flaky, likeable Rachel Green. Female fans flocked to copy Aniston’s haircut, known as “The Rachel.” And now they rally to share her pain—as well as a schadenfreude thrill.

Aniston’s position atop the tabloid pantheon was cemented with her union with Pitt, whom she met Hollywood cute in 1998 through their mutual agent. The merger of America’s Sweetheart and the World’s Sexiest Man in 2000 was a lavish event that featured a 40-person gospel choir and fireworks over the Pacific. They were the king and queen of the Hollywood prom, with matching tans and blond streaks. When they split Aniston was poised for post-Friends career breakout; initially she was the one blamed for being unwilling to “have Brad’s babies,” to employ tabloid lexicon. When Jolie’s involvement became known, Aniston became the object of sympathy, and pity. After all, what chance did the Girl Next Door have against the Girl From the Next Galaxy? The New Yorker film critic Anthony Lane summed up perception of Jolie’s snaring of Pitt: “She took one look at the world’s most widely desired man and scooped him up with no more ado than a Parisian grande dame tucking a chihuahua into her clutch bag.”

The scandal was likened to Eddie Fisher leaving Debbie Reynolds for Elizabeth Taylor in the ’60s. But back then there wasn’t a celebrity media complex ready to pounce on Reynolds’ every humiliation, real or imagined. For the wounded Aniston, the salt poured down, beginning with an arty 60-page photo spread in the June 2005 W titled “Domestic Bliss,” in which Pitt and Jolie presided over a band of little blond Brads.

Aniston shot back with a tearful Vanity Fair interview in which she admitted to being hurt and lonely and denied rumours that she didn’t want children: “That really pissed me off. I’ve never in my life said I didn’t want to have children. I did and I do and I will!”

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  • janice

    alissa. she passed a comment about and article that was just a few weeks ago . and she has moved on with a younger and hotter guy. but flapperlips and pirr have not and bring her name up at all the movies when they want pr. so don.t blame the ex for their behaviour please be honest as you are a woman and i am sure you would be much more bitchy if this happened to you and your ex and his mistress lied about you every change they got. as for the beautiful family there are parents longong for those adopted kids she took instead of helping those people get their lives back and helping them keep their kids that is a true and pure helper of people. people should question and not just acept what people that blow their own trumpets when ever they do good but live the most decadent and wasteful lives in castles and buy the most redicules furniture and have six nannies because they are to busy to look after their own kids.

  • laila

    I am so disgusted that such a misogynistic piece of crap is coming from a Canadian source, and from a magazine that purports to be a seeing the truth about the press maumors were spread by her then husband anews magazine, not a tabloid of the worst kind. To Alissa, and all the other supporters of the Brandgelina child collecting PR machine, Aniston did not ask to be involved in their disgraceful lifestyle, and she is merely commenting on comments made recently by Jolie. After keeping quiet about her husband’s affair for the last three years, not four, Jolie has started telling anyone who will listen about falling in love with Aniston’s husband while they were still married. A new article released today in the UK, has her saying “their family” started during the filming, as her son Maddox was there. It is Jolie that will not stop bragging about her she acquired Pitt (just in time as she had filmed only flops in years) .Aniston was asked her opinion on Jolie’s comments, and she said they were “uncool”, the understatement of the decade in most people’s views.
    It never fails to astound me how this couple, who have thrown a “family” of six children together in three years, several months of those while Pitt was married, only to sell their privacy to the highest bidder and then drag them around the world constantly, denying them friends or stability, are praised. Meanwhile a woman whose husband betrayed her in a cruel and public way including allowing his girlfriend to spread malicious lies that she would not have children, is the one who is mocked while the adulterers continue to discuss her whenever either one has a movie to promote one of the cruelest and baffling things I have ever witnessed. I am really ashamed that it is a Canadian news magazine attacking this woman, while the rest of the world is finally waking up to the constant taunts of Jolie towards her babydaddy’s ex, and saying they have had enough. In case MacLean’s hasn’t noticed, Jolie has proven she can’t act and Pitt has aged twenty years in the last three, Aniston is the one who has a broader fan base, and she has re-established a production company after leaving Plan B with her divorce. St. Jolie would never have been considered for A Mighty Heart if Aniston had not acquired it to produce. She easily trumps Jolie in brains, talents and looks and her future looks much brighter than Brandgelina’s. Keep to news, MacLean’s, you don’t have a clue about popular culture. I hope you are proud of the spiteful and stupid women you have brought to your site. They are not welcome in many places anymore, and reading their deluded hate rants should tell you why. Jolie has repeatedly said that the affair started during filming, and they are still denying it. Congratulations on attracting the bottom feeders of the internet. I will ensure that your magazine and all affiliated productions are boycotted by myself and extended family.

  • laila

    For some reason, the previous box that allowed comments was much smaller than this one, and I could not see that several portions I had edited out, still showed up in the post. I apologize for the length and errors. The first sentence should read:

    I am disgusted that such a misogynistic piece of crap is coming from a Canadian source, and from a magazine that purports to be a a news magazine, not a tabloid of the worst kind.

  • Jo

    I cannot believe this publication presented an article like this. You wonder why women struggle with self-esteem issues. Even “news magazines” attack us from all sides. Jennifer Aniston is not pathetic, but this article certainly is.

  • ECFan

    I’m always amazed at the number of Aniston fans who forget that her marriage to Pitt was on the brink of divorce for almost 2 years BEFORE he ever met Jolie. Angelina Jolie DID NOT cause the rift between Pitt and Aniston. It already existed when she met him.

    Have Aniston’s fans really forgotten about how the tabloids spent 2 years asking why the couple spent so much time apart? A sane person doesn’t put much credence in the tabloids, so bear in mind that everything I’m about to say are STATEMENTS THEY MADE TO LEGITIMATE NEWS AGENCIES AND MAGAZINES, NOT TABLOID STORIES. These are items from interviews with Barbara Walters, Diane Sawyer, Vanity Fair, Vogue, GQ, Esquire and Rolling Stone.

    For instance – what about when Aniston accidentally on purpose forgot to thank Pitt when she won a Golden Globe? If you’ve never seen the tape of this go to YouTube and look it up. And then there’s – Why Aniston keep saying they were working on kids, but none ever came? Why Aniston proclaimed in a TV interview that Pitt was “NOT the love of my life, but certainly A LOVE.”? Or Pitt’s referring to their marriage as “a merger” and “I’m not sure two people are meant to be together forever” and “Let’s see how far THIS THING takes us?” Or Pitt’s statement that he was sick of Aniston kicking him out of his own house and then telling all their personal business to her gaggle of girlfriends she calls her “Goddess Circle”? Aniston’s own FATHER said Pitt was, “Certainly in no hurry to get to the alter.”

    Or how about before their marriage when Pitt said he and Aniston had a common love of modern and contemporary furniture…only after the marriage Aniston claimed Pitt’s desire to furnish their Beverly Hills home with modern furniture was stupid because the furniture was “uncomfortable”? When Pitt left the country for nearly 6 months to film Troy in 2003 she only visited him TWICE. What woman who doesn’t have to CHOOSES to leave her husband alone in foreign countries for 6 months? This was during a time when “Friends” had wrapped for the season, but instead of going to Malta to be with Pitt she signed on to do a movie instead. This is during a time that many industry insiders were saying the two were having a trial separtion. I’m talking about EARLY 2003, NOT 2004! That’s a full year before Pitt worked with Jolie. With Pitt out of the country Aniston then told an interviewer she was “…glad he’s gone…” and that because he was she “…can now furnish the house with comfortable furniture…” At which point she proceeded to fill the house that Pitt had had labored 2 years to remodel (in a modernist style, mind you), doing a lot of the work himself, with chitz and Laura Ashley-type furniture and Pitt didn’t find out until he got back to the States.

    And on the subject of children Aniston stated that Pitt wanted “…at least seven” and then commented, “HE’LL BE LUCKY IF HE GETS TWO.” Lucky? IF? Are these REALLY the actions and words of a couple in a harmonious marriage? If you think so, then your idea of marriage and mine are polar opposites. Theirs was a marriage on the brink of collapse for over 2 years before Jolie even met Pitt. The fact that she came along when she did is moot. Jolie, Pitt and Aniston have all said there was no sexual affair. Aniston herself admitted to Harper’s Bazaar that she knew the marriage was over by the summer of 2004. The M&MS shoot lasted off-and-on well into March 2005. Pitt even told an Indian television interviewer that he missed some world news in the spring of 2005 because he was, “too busy CHASING ANGELINA.” Yeah, that’s right – she resisted getting involved in what was sure to be a sh#t storm. HE did the chasing…yet SHE gets painted as the bad guy. That says a lot about how our society devalues women and absolves men of their own actions. And that’s pretty damned sad.

  • j scrila

    Janice, good use of grammar. I take it English is not your first language? LOL

    • janice

      j scrilla if i wanted to waste my grammar and pure english on trashy idol worshipping americans or the trashy canadians i would not be on this forum. are you here to teach and preach like a schoole teacher . the woman here that can praise a homewrecker and try to justify her by stating that pitts marraige was on the rocks one question where you living with this couple that you can truthfully say this or is it all just gossip picked up by trashy american and canadian magazines to sell for the mighty dollar. i apologise to the honest and decent americans and canadians but these others that seem to justify adultery and disgracefull behaviour from pitt and jolie, as my sirname is dos santos what do you think teacher.

  • carolyn

    I Love Jennifer Aniston, I think your article is a load of crap. Jennifer is 100% better then that
    ho- Angelia Jolie…..
    Macleans has Jolie as a saint….OMG!!! I cant believe this magazine.

  • lana

    ECFan

    What a fantastic post!

    Thank you for setting the record straight!

    The true ‘fans’ of Jennifer Aniston should remember all that she said and did during her time with Mr. Pitt.

    Some of these people who speak out on her behalf, as she continues to “whine” incessantly about her loss, or what was allegedly “stolen” from her, either have selective memory disease or are PAID Huvane bloggers trying, desperately, to keep her “relevant” while she is being ‘eclipsed by a Supernova.’

    Mr. and Mrs. Jolie-Pitt never include the ex’s name in their conversations. The ex does NOT inhabit their world or their thoughts.

    It is past time for Aniston to move on. Take responsibility for your OWN part in the dissolution of your marriage and quit trying to place blame where it does NOT belong.

    You do not and cannot blame Brad because you KNOW he never cheated on you, and your hatred towards Angelina is irrational and unwarranted.

    Call off your ‘attack’ dogs……; Stop trying to paint Angelina as your nemesis. This dog will no longer hunt and you are beginning to look very foolish.

    Angelina never did anything to you to deserve your negative comments and you KNOW that as well, and the sooner you admit that to yourself and to everyone else, the sooner you will find the true happiness that you have found and will continue to find – so elusive.

  • Boskaba

    “How did Macleans, once Canada’s news magazine, morph into a tabloid rag?”

    My sentiments exactly.

    On the other hand, it is a reliable indicator of the dip the quality of a publication takes.

  • http://www.littlemsperfect.com MsPerfect

    Man. We can really get worked up over something so trivial as someone else’s love life. We don’t even know these people personally. All we really know is what we’re told through the mouth of the media, and we all know what that’s worth, don’t we? Think Rock Hudson, think Lindsay Lohan, think the Olsen twins.
    Come on. There are more important things to discuss…like how we’re going to save poor, innocent Katie from that crazy, Scientology crusader, Tom Cruise.

  • chris

    thats so unfair to her

  • queen bee

    THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU…….FOR THIS BRILLIANT ARTICLE!!!….AND FOR SAYING WHAT THE REST OF US ARE THINKING!…

    Jennifer Aniston is the most overated star in hollywood. Millions of insecure women are living vicariously through her and therefore, demonizing Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. It’s truly pathetic..

    …In the end, Jen jen has done more harm to her persona than good……while I was indifferent to her as a person, but enjoyed her on friends……at the present time I am absolutely sick of her passive aggressive attitude and the way she uses the press for he advantage, while bemoaning the fact that she is ‘above it all’….yeah right! She’s milked Brad Pitts popularity and the divorce for all its worth, and I AM COMPLETLY SICK OF HER. As I said…..I cant stand her, and will definitely not go to see a movie of hers at the boxoffice…

  • Team “Uncool”

    To ECfan: Excellent post. You said it all.

    Of all the tiresome, boring creatures on the planet, this woman takes the cake. Whine, whine, whine. Damn, chica, get over it, will you?! Listen to her talking about the dissolution of her marriage in Vanity Fair: “I was shocked! The world was shocked!” Well excuse me, lady, but it’s not all about you. The world has a great many more substantial things to be shocked about than your crappy marriage imploding. And then she goes on to accept “maybe 2% of the blame” for her marriage breaking up. Give me a break. If she had been a better wife to Pitt, she might still be married to him.

    I am sick and tired of this loser. She acts like she’s sixteen years old. She needs to grow the hell up, admit her share in the failure of her marriage and move on already. No wonder she can’t hold a man with all the emotional baggage she drags around behind her.

    It never ceases to amaze me that there are so many bitter, angry, lonely people who have resurrected an altar to their patron saint of scorned women. Too bad they will never know what it’s like to be on a winning team.

  • http://www.mcleans.com BRIGHTON

    Jennifer Aniston is a disgrace to strong women who were left by their husband or lover. I am one of those women,I have two kids and my husband left me for another woman. Too bad I don’t have a career that pays me millions and I don’t have $110 million in my bank account like Aniston. I am too busy to feel sorry for myself because I work two jobs, working 14 hours a day, getting paid 12 dolllars an hour.
    Tell me why should I pity her? I feel sorry for thousands of women like me who has children to support and get minimum wage. I bet Ms. Aniston, judging from her tan and and gorgeous hair doesn’t have to worry about anything else except her appearance which I’m not impressed anyway. I don’t understand why people feel sorry for her and why blame Angelina Jolie…why not blame Brad Pitt? He was the one who left her, didn’t he? It takes two to make and break a marriage. Do we really know what happened? What we know is what the media tells us.

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  • http://google Elena Harrington

    Comparing Jennifer to Angelina is like comparing apples to oranges or vegeburger to filet mignon.

    Jennifer is a shallow, untalented, self-centered moron who casts aside her own mother over her ex-mother-in-law to weep to about her problems. Could you possibly get more pathetic than that?

    Angelina is a wordly, beautiful woman who deeply mourned the loss of her mother and views the world in the “big picture.” Her beauty comes naturally from within.

    Angelina doesn’t have to stand in front of a mirror and reassure herself that she’s beautiful. It comes naturally.

    And as far as Debbie Reynolds and Liz Taylor – Liz was villified for the Eddie Fisher thing – but in the end, Liz showed true talent while Debbie Reynolds was just a big “has been.”

    Angie’s Camp

  • Sonia

    Anne Kingston should spend her time writing articles that actually matter. Waste of paper and waste of ink.

  • Wingo

    Ridiculous and sexist.

  • John

    Hey..I guess she has to do what she has to do. She will NEVER be a big movie star so I guess she has to pose semi nude now. PATHETIC Jen..oh wait..you are a serious actress! HA

  • Frankie

    I agree with Ms. Harrington – Jennifer is shallow and talentless. I’m tired of people blaming Jolie for the break-up – did we forget Brad’s part in this? Maybe if Jennifer paid a little more attention to their marriage they would have still been married …..

  • KENDALL

    OMG YOU PEOPLE ARE SO STUCK UP!! GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOU’RE BUTTS….SHE WAS AND STILL IS AMERICAS SWEETHEART FOR A REASON ONE THAT MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE SCUMB!! HOW DARE YOU TRY AND PUT DOWN SOMEONE BETTER THAN YOURSELF ONLY BECAUSE YOU ARNT HER!!! GET A LIFE YOU SUCK!

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