What the hell is wrong with you idiots: ’08 edition

It began with the Eagles, who sold millions at Wal-Mart, and Journey, who also somehow secured an exclusive deal with the retailer, possibly when company executives, high on paint fumes from Chinese toys, briefly believed it to be 1986. Now add AC/DC and its new CD, Black Ice.

AC/DC’s decision to strike an alliance with Wal-Mart is the latest example of hard times in the record industry. I’m not saying sales are way down across the board, but hip-hop stars now rap about their extravagant consumption of reasonably priced domestic wine coolers. The sense of panic is so extreme that 3 Doors Down made and released an album this year without anyone at the record company noticing and stopping them.

Exclusive deals with retailers are the wave of the future. But they give tremendous power to companies like Wal-Mart. Need proof? Here is the list of songs on the new AC/DC record:

• You Shook Me Until 9 p.m., at Which Time the Store Closed for the Day

• Let There be Rock Tumblers at the Everyday Low Price of $29.99

• It’s a Long Way to the Target (So You Might As Well Shop Here)

• Dirty Deeds Done Slightly Cheaper Than at J.C. Penney

• Back in Black Pantyhose with Girdle

• For Those About to Rock We Encourage You to Check Out the Wide Selection of Bic Lighters