Monday Caption Challenge No. 1 (The Reboot)

This caption totally and completely writes itself—now get out there and write it!

by Scott Feschuk on Monday, November 30, 2009 5:56am - 104 Comments

Stephen Harper. In a Zodiac. In a suit. Folks, this caption totally and completely writes itself – now get out there and write it!

* The winner of each week’s caption challenge, as declared by a jury of me (or, on occasion, a guest juror of considerable aplomb and free time), shall receive a prize valued in the tens of dollars – right up until we get a sponsor for this thing, at which time the prize will become actually worth winning. (Attention potential sponsors: This is what’s known in the business as a HINT.)

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  • Joan Tintor

    "There aren't any of those Somali pirates down here, are there?"

  • Kevin

    The troops he's using for this photo op are serving aboard the HMCS Ville de Quebec so presumably are Navy personnel.

  • Dee

    Bravo!

  • Ian

    I suppose this is a bad time to tell you about budgetary cutbacks.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Sir_Francis Sir_Francis

    Superb!

    Naturally, Harper would take the lead vocal. Any thoughts on accompaniment? Piano? Lute? Zither? Spoons?

  • Lord Kitchener's Own

    OK, seriously though, about the life jacket thing. WTF?

    I'm 100% confident in the ability of those two fine gentlemen to save the PM if he goes over the side, but HOW IS HE NOT WEARING A LIFE JACKET?!?!? Can you imagine a picture of the President of the United States on a Navy zodiac in which the PRESIDENT is the only person in the boat without a life jacket on??? Did no one at any time say "Gee, everyone else here has a life jacket on, maybe we ought to throw one on the PRIME MINISTER OF THE COUNTRY". No?

    • Mike T.

      Dude, it's photoshopped :)

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/lgarvin lgarvin

      He's wearing a life jacket under his suit.

      • kcm

        No, that's a navy regulation breakfast.

    • MJ Patchouli

      You can't see it in the photo, but the boat's actually still tied to the dock…

    • Dee

      Where's a rogue wave when you really need one?

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Jack_Mitchell Jack Mitchell

    Thanks! Hmm, good question. Harper on piano, Baird on bass drum, Poilièvre on tambourine, Duffy on the BIG maracas.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/NotStephen Not Stephen Colbert

    "I'm on a boat, motherf**ker, take a look at me!
    Straight flowin' on a boat on the deep blue sea!
    Bustin' five knots, wind whippin out my coat!
    You can't stop me motherf**ker, 'cause I'm on a boat!"

    • Mike T.

      damn! u beat me!

    • etbil2

      Give him the fifty bucks

    • Iccyh

      Nice call, nice call.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Crit_Reasoning Crit_Reasoning

    And John Baird on the triangle.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/jasonhickman jasonhickman

    "Calling All Captains!"

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Crit_Reasoning Crit_Reasoning

    "OK, boys, let's do another take… this time, with Tom Clancy on my right instead of my left."

  • Lord Kitchener's Own

    "The photos not turning out to the PM's satisfaction on the first pass, the zodiac was forced to turn around, go back to shore, and repeat the entire trip back to the ship so that the photographers could get one more try".

  • http://notquiteunhinged.blogspot.com Catelli

    I'm flying, Jack!

  • Gerard

    What do you mean they didn't say boarding water?

  • doug Rogers

    "No life jacket? Hah! I have an inflatable head!"

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/danby danby

    Soon… soon this will all be mine… and Danny Williams will grovel….

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Tceh Tceh

    "Look Canada! I'm like Washington crossing the Delaware!"

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Washington_Cros…

  • kcm

    Harper: I wont put my lifejacket on. I wont! Not unless you let me drive!

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/doug_rogers doug_rogers

    "So, if I fell overboard, you proud men in uniform would rescue me… right?"

  • Reptile Yuks

    "Harper declined a life-jacket saying that it was, 'too Village People'."

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Raging_Ranter Raging_Ranter

    I could swear I saw him put his wallet in this pocket right here.

  • http://notquiteunhinged.blogspot.com Catelli

    I Am the Very Model of a Modern Prime Minister…

  • http://notquiteunhinged.blogspot.com Catelli

    I Am the Very Model of a Modern Prime Minister
    People Ascribe to me plots so very sinister
    But I defy the critics and all elitist professerors
    To wax more eloquent when hiding behind our soldiers

    I'm very well acquainted, too, with facts and theories
    But I give them no credit when inspiring the furies
    Of the mindless drones who follow me religiously
    Into the guns of reason and scientific philosophies

    • Iccyh

      And he's never ever sick at sea.

  • Mike T.

    Stephen's face dropped as the Zodiac turned and began heading AWAY from the mainland. All to late he remembered…the legislation, the one that was supposed to quash the opposition and make it powerless against his will, but instead spawned the coalition that had almost toppled him. The press had focused on the anti-equality aspect, and to be frank that was mostly what he remembered. But it had been a union-busting law, too…unions such as coast guard local 613…

  • Reptile Yuks

    "Remember what the media said when Stockwell wore proper seafaring attire on that jetski? No way I'm making that mistake…" – Stephen Harper.

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