Beyond The Commons

Aaron Wherry covers all the goings-on in and around Parliament Hill. Follow Aaron on Twitter: @aaronwherry

Categories: Beyond The Commons, Capital Read

The state long ago stopped caring about your toilet ownership

by Aaron Wherry on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 2:04pm - 0 Comments

Further to this, the word “toilet” does not appear on the new National Household Survey. The word “bathroom,” as in the 2006 census, appears only to note that such rooms not be counted.

According to Statistics Canada, the census last asked about toilet ownership in 1961. The question that year asked “whether there was an inside flush toilet and whether there was one or two or more.”

The Prime Minister at the time was noted nanny statist and famed Ottawa elitist John Diefenbaker.

Tags: census, John Diefenbaker, Statistics Canada, toilets

More by Aaron Wherry

LiveBloggin Junkie

Monomania (mon·o·ma·ni·a):
1. Pathological obsession with one idea or subject.
2. Intent concentration on or exaggerated enthusiasm for a single subject or idea

Congratulations! 26 days of censomania Aaron! Don't stop now!

http://intensedebate.com/people/ChrisWPG ChrisWPG

And 26 days of LiveBlogginJunkie's posts on the topic, maybe you can get joint treatment?

LiveBloggin Junkie

Dude, I would love some 'joint' treatment!

http://intensedebate.com/people/ChrisWPG ChrisWPG

That is what I had in mind : )

Livebloggin Junkie

Now I'm jealous of Aaron. Who better to help with 'joint' treatment then The rolling people http://www2.macleans.ca/2010/07/28/the-rolling-pe…

http://intensedebate.com/people/Stewart_Smith Stewart_Smith

It is an affront to treat falsehood with complaisance.
Thomas Paine

Orson Bean

I think we all figured out that Clement & Co. were spewing falsehoods about this issue some time ago. Except for the terminally obtuse, and they're beyond help anyway.

It's like ice cream — I really really like Haagen Dagz Vanilla Swiss Almond, but that doesn't mean I want to eat nothing but that, every meal, for 2 weeks straight. Nor would it be healthy to do so.

John D

Are you talking about Clement's obsession with bedrooms and bathrooms?
Gaunilon

To first order, the number of posts Wherry does on a particular topic are directly related to the potential impact he perceives that topic to have on the political balance between the Conservatives and the Liberals.

The equation is N = k*x where N is number of posts, k is a constant, and x is perceived impact. The census has a fairly high perceived impact of 5, so with a standard k of 75, we can expect roughly 375 posts on it. Something like the Liberal bus tour had x = 1 at first, but then as the bus tour broke down x went negative so the posts stopped. Items like Clement's attempted water rescue have negative x all along, so no posts. (N is lower-bounded at 0, of course)

Naturally a more detailed analysis takes into account that k is not truly a constant, but rather a function of what other issues might simultaneously have an even greater strategic impact. At this point the analysis gets complicated, because the k for various issues are coupled. Analytical solutions are no longer available and one has to resort to numerical approaches.

a-non

Yah, it gets messy because x is a function of N. Depending on the topic, there are probably decreasing or increasing returns. For the census, I imagine it's quickly decreasing. For something like an adultery scandal, it's probably increasing for a while. Steady state equilibrium first-order approximations are usually the best we can do.

OH WAIT, out here in the REAL WORLD, we're supposed to do things by COMPLETE RANDOM and not based on intelligence and evidence. Sorry for that.

Gaunilon

Don't forget non-steady-state solutions: the equation can be re-expressed as x = N/k such that perceived impact on Liberal/CPC fortunes depends on number of posts….in this case if N is time dependent, it begins to look like Hooke's Law, simple harmonic motion results, and one gets the strangely regular oscillations we saw between the Guergis and Detainee Docs posts in May.

http://intensedebate.com/people/Stewart_Smith Stewart_Smith

Perhaps Wherry only posts posts that he believes Gaunilon will comment on?

wsam

We should abolish all knowledge.

http://intensedebate.com/people/McC_ McC_

sounds almost Socratic

wsam

It's from the director's cut. The commentary is hilarious.

Olaf

At this point, I think Wherry's just recycling older posts so he doesn't have to actually do any work.

http://intensedebate.com/people/Crit_Reasoning Crit_Reasoning

In fairness, he did say "further to this" and linked to his older post about toilet questions in the census.

Olaf

What is it with your unhealthy obsession with fairness, CR? I'm slagging Wherry here, and if I want to do so unreasonably and without actually clicking on the links he provides, and embarrassing myself in the process, I don't see how that's any of your business.

http://intensedebate.com/people/Douglass Douglass

Lol! Not to bother with logic when assumptions can get you through the day! Thanks for the laugh!

Olaf

It's not so much that you shouldn't bother with logic, it's more that sometimes there's just no time to be reasonable. I'm on a pretty tight schedule here: I need to get in at least 6 or 7 snide anti-Wherry remarks come end of work day. Sometimes my integrity must be compromised to hit quota.
http://intensedebate.com/people/Crit_Reasoning Crit_Reasoning

Sometimes my integrity must be compromised to hit quota.

Couldn't you just lower the quota? What if you restricted yourself to just one or two snide anti-Wherry comments per day, but you made sure they were real humdingers?
Kevin

He said "need" – that's a mandatory requirement. If he voluntarily reduced the quote to 2, bias would creep in and the results would be untrustworthy. Haven't you been paying attention?
Sigh

Perhaps if he sent out his anti- comments to more bloggers, that would counteract the creeping bias resulting from the change to voluntary?
Olaf

First of all, you seem to be under the impression that I set my own quota. Now who's making the assumptions?

Second of all, I've always been, by nature, a quantity over quality type guy.

Emily

Well there you are, nobody cares about your toilets. So that bidet you've secretly installed won't be asked about either.

a-non

Bidets are European and thus elitist anyway.

Emily

Exactly, it would ruin their red-neck credentials permanently.

wsam

Which is why bidets should be included on the census. That way we can compare bidet ownership in Southwest Calgary with Toronto's Annex neoghbourhood. Then we'll know where to find the real toileting elitists.

That's what is really going on. The Conservatives don't want anyone to find out about their elitist toileting habits.

Also. People who have bidets don't have to wipe their bums, so they don't. Which is disgusting.

Emily

Gee….you mean some Calgarians might be…you know….secretly French?

Actually I think you'd have to wipe, or your nether parts would be all wet.
http://intensedebate.com/people/ChrisWPG ChrisWPG

LOL it's funny how many people "think" they now how to use one but really don't.
Emily

Yes, tis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bidet
Olaf

Chris, please be careful. Emily is quite adept with wikipedia.
Emily

You betcha! ;-)
http://intensedebate.com/people/Raging_Ranter Raging_Ranter

They're for taking a drink after you've gone. Aren't they?
http://intensedebate.com/people/madeyoulook madeyoulook

That response may be the best explanation for your avatar's photo that anyone couldl ever come up with.
http://intensedebate.com/people/Raging_Ranter Raging_Ranter

I detect a strong anti-simian bias here.
http://intensedebate.com/people/madeyoulook madeyoulook

Is that scent stronger or weaker than the peculiar scent emanating from your face?

Here. Have a face cloth, some soap, a toothbrush and some Crest. And allow me to introduce you to the sink. Hot is on the left, cold is on the right. You're welcome.

…

Uh, no thanks. I'll pick the bugs out of my own fur, but it was kind of you to offer.
http://intensedebate.com/people/Raging_Ranter Raging_Ranter

But I pee in the sink.
madeyoulook

Given where you quench your thirst, that shouldn't trouble you too much as you get busy with the toothbrush… I said it's a TOOTHbrush, Ranter! EEEEeeeeeewww, let me see if we have another one. And I will hasten to teach you about the bidet thing right after that.
Orson Bean

First time I spotted a bidet in my life was in Calgary, circa around 1980 or so, at my best friend's very wealthy dad's house. We were quite mystified on first spotting it. Given what I know about his dad, I'm quite sure he was not a Liberal or NDP voter.
wsam

Did he wipe his bum properly?

RDB

The horse is dead, Wherry. Stop shooting its brains out. Ever hear of a summer vacation? I recommend you take one. Maybe to therapy for your compulsive-posting-on-the-same-topic disorder or maybe to a nice swamp where you can spend time swatting away mosquitoes the way I swat away your mind-numbing posts on the way to the interesting ones.

Emily

Yes, Cons want this issue to go away, so anyone that writes about it gets insulted.

avr

Wherry has a bad habit of getting obsessively deranged about a single imagined scandal for weeks or months on end, treating it like the total apocalypse that hardly anyone outside his little echo chamber will. Afghan torture, prorogation, the census, ad infinitum. Mocking that isn't trying to change the channel because of some desperate strategic imperative; it's just fun.

Emily

Actually he's a journalist following up on a story so it doesn't get lost in the ether….exactly the way he's supposed to do.

RDB

Well you might say that. Unfortunately, if he bores us to death he might get us to tune out instead.

http://intensedebate.com/people/Halo_Override Halo_Override

If you beat your children every day, should I only phone the police once?

wsam

You shouldn't beat your children. It's bad.
http://intensedebate.com/people/Halo_Override Halo_Override

Bleeding heart.

http://intensedebate.com/people/madeyoulook madeyoulook

avr, Aaron will be very hurt. You didn't even mention Omar…

Dave

Since when has the death of a horse ever mattered?

The Tories still drop the word "sponsorship" and "coalition" into every other clause.

Or at least Pierre Poilievre does.
Jan

Not when used as a beer cooler.

RDB – Craig from the Blogging Tories Forum – is that you? I can see how you'd be jealous of the numbers.

RDB

How come no one believes I'm just bored? How cynical you all are.

wsam

I believe you.

http://intensedebate.com/people/tobyornotoby tobyornotoby

Maybe the prime minister could show some leadership and change the channel for us. All he has to do is stroll over to the parliamentary press gallery and take some questions.
Mandatory Jedi

Well then…what's the point of filling in the census if I can't brag about my 43 toilets!
http://intensedebate.com/people/TwoYen TwoYen

More than 50 percent of Japanese households have a bidet. Does that make them French? No. Nor does it make ownership of a bidet a sign of elitism.

http://intensedebate.com/people/Crit_Reasoning Crit_Reasoning

I agree that bidet ownership doesn't make them French or elitist. It just means that more than 50% of Japanese households have achieved rectal hygiene.

wsam

You wrote rectal hygiene!!!! Ha! Ha!

The Samuri were elitist and they were Japanese, exclusively.
Dave

It's a bidet, not an enematic anal probe.

a-non

Well since we're discussing Japanese hygiene practices, I'm going to point out the existence of "washlet syndrome".
wsam

anal probe! Ha Ha!
http://intensedebate.com/people/Raging_Ranter Raging_Ranter

Though I find that since my purchase of the enematic anal probe, I've used the bidet a lot less frequently.

Margaret

I think Diefenbaker was the ugliest thing ever hatched by the human race.

wsam

That's racist

Margaret

I love this column.

Keep up the good work.
http://intensedebate.com/people/madeyoulook madeyoulook

The state long ago stopped caring about your toilet ownership

Shame, that. Ours is running a bit, and I think there's a seal that's a little brittle from age. I was kinda hoping there would be a government grant program, or something.

http://intensedebate.com/people/Raging_Ranter Raging_Ranter

There was an eco-grant in the city of Ottawa for those who replaced their toilets with low-flow models, but they nixed it.

http://intensedebate.com/people/madeyoulook madeyoulook

The taxpayers were flushed with rage in opposition? Good. It was a crappy idea, after all.

hosertohoosier

Diefenbaker WAS a big supporter of a nanny-state, who arguably ran to the left of the Liberal Party. He expanded the size of government faster than GDP, AND pushed the Bank of Canada to cut interest rates, emphasizing a concern for unemployment over inflation/the exchange rate (a decision that resulted in a spat between Diefenbaker and the governor of the bank of Canada – an incident of particular relevance to at least one Maclean's staff member).

Real Government spending, 1957-1963 (1986 dollars)
195719882
195820832
195920995
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196125479
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