WINNER DECLARED: At 2 p.m. ET, madeyoulook held the slightest of leads over e_ron in what is surely – and I’m going from memory here, so forgive me if I’m making a mistake – the closest finish in the three-week history of the Caption Challenge. I for one am spent.

Congratulations, myl. Please flip me an email at scott.feschuk@macleans.rogers.com for prize-based reasons.

Coming Thursday: A special year-end-themed non-caption caption challenge. Whaa? Alert your friends, neighbours and the smarter of your domestic pets.

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Yes, yes: For some reason it has been – and may still be – impossible for you, the home reader, to peruse all the witticisms vying for lexical glory in Caption Challenge No. 3. For some reason, the second and third pages of comments were as cloistered yesterday as Tiger Woods’ naughty bits. But through the magic of the Internet and, more important, the magic of magic, I have been able to gain full access to the slate of entries. It cost me the eyes of my last newt, but I did it. (And now I’m out of newt eye – right at the holidays.)

Anyhoo, I’ve narrowed Caption Challenge No. 3 to five finalists. Read the entries, consider the entries, sniff, sip, swish and expel the entries (with your mind) – and then vote below* for your favourite. The prize – a $30 gift certificate to famed and very sexy bookseller Amazon.ca, who appears to have lost weight (have you lost weight, Amazon.ca?) – goes to the finalist who’s Continue…