Pippa and the new tabloid royalty

By Anne Kingston - Monday, May 30, 2011 at 9:50 AM - 5 Comments

Getty Images; Reuters; Photo illustration by Taylor Shute

On April 29, the British tabloids officially lost “Waity Kaity,” the nickname they’d foisted on Kate Middleton. But the gods of fame and rumour more than compensated with a cast of characters destined to feed the gossip mills and paparazzi for years. And just in time: post-engagement and wedding, the “Wills & Kate” narrative is in cruise control until the inevitable “baby bump” rumours fly.

Westminster Abbey, the focus of a billion eyes, provided an ideal incubator for celebrity creation—which clearly has a lot less to do with talent or accomplishment than genetics, timing and exposure. The day served as a snapshot of the piffle that excites the masses—derrières, dresses, outlandish hats. The day’s breakout star, Pippa Middleton, was already well known to the tabs: the 27-year-old party planner has been a girl about London for years. In 2008, Tatler named her “the No. 1 society singleton,” but couldn’t resist snarking: “Goes to a lot of parties, but mainly as the caterer.” That was before the royal seal of approval, back when the Middletons were ridiculed as parvenus and Kate and Pippa dubbed the “Wisteria Sisters” for their social climbing acumen.

Then, presto, Pippa donned The Dress and minced up the aisle, a journey that served as a primal dog whistle, launching a million tweets and the “Pippa Middleton Ass Appreciation Society.” Pippa hadn’t exited the church on Prince Harry’s arm before speculation raged that the two would hook up at the reception. It’s a scenario ripe for triangulation, dragging in Pippa’s now-famous beau, Alex Loudon, a handsome former cricket player turned financier known as “Minotaur,” and Prince Harry’s off-on girlfriend Chelsy Davy. The permutations are endless.

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Standing on ceremony

By Kate Fillion - Thursday, May 12, 2011 at 9:00 AM - 0 Comments

Alastair Grant/AP

Nothing says courage quite like including six young children in your wedding party, unless it’s choosing as wranglers a young man who’s been called the bad boy of the royal family and a young woman who’s been called the most eligible singleton in the kingdom. With so many wild cards, anything could have gone wrong.

But nothing did. Pippa Middleton made sure of that. After helping her sister exit the car at Westminster Abbey and expertly arranging the train of the wedding dress just so on the red carpet, she took charge of the children, smiling calmly throughout. Walking up the aisle hand in hand with the pair of three-year-old bridesmaids, she summoned memories of Diana’s easy, natural way with children. And yet the impression she created was all her own: while her unobtrusive manner indicated a willingness to fade modestly into the background, Pippa’s form-fitting dress, with buttons up the back and a small train of its own, made that quite impossible. Unusually, it was only a shade or two away from Kate’s own gown, and the cut was substantially more revealing. There were whispers, and within minutes, squawks and tweets: had the maid of honour upstaged the bride? Online, detractors emerged, sniffing about the chestnut hue of Pippa’s fake tan. But in the church, she dispatched her duties serenely and with dignity.

Prince Harry, too, stepped up, which is to say that he was subdued and entirely proper throughout the ceremony, after cracking his brother up with a whispered aside as Kate approached the altar holding her father’s hand. There was nothing inappropriate in that, though: the best man’s job description is to lighten the mood. And after the ceremony, heading to the palace in a carriage with the youngest members of the wedding party, he was impeccably avuncular, reassuring the children and putting them at ease.

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This week: Newsmakers

By Nancy Macdonald and Maclean's staff - Friday, April 1, 2011 at 11:06 AM - 0 Comments

Jerome Delay/AP

The heartless contessa?
Celebrity chef Ina Garten, of Barefoot Contessa fame, was shamed into fulfilling a six-year-old cancer patient’s dying wish of cooking a meal with her. “Last year, Ina gave a ‘soft no,’ supposedly because she had a 10-month book tour,” Enzo Pereda‘s mother explained in a blog post. Her son, who was diagnosed with leukemia three years ago, loves watching Garten while resting in bed; he told Garten’s people he would wait. Even after being turned down a second time, last week, she wrote, “he STILL loves the Contessa.” Garten, who was criticized by bloggers and news sites, said she “became aware of Enzo’s story this weekend,” and will be calling him immediately to invite him to the set.

It’s my party, I’ll cry if I want to
Danny Williams‘s big snit continues. After abruptly cancelling a tribute in his honour—an event organized by his own brother, lawyer and veteran Tory fundraiser Tommy Williams—the ex-premier accused his replacement Kathy Dunderdale and her ministers of distancing themselves from him. “They don’t even want me to have the cell numbers of cabinet ministers—I mean, I can’t explain that,” Williams told the CBC. Newfoundlanders who want to relive the memory of his happier days can pick up a copy of Danny Williams: A Profile, a newly released collection of photos from his time in office.

Darren McCollester/Getty Images

A different kind of lone gunman
A five-foot-seven-inch Gurkha soldier from the British county of Kent who single-handedly repelled a Taliban attack has been awarded Britain’s Conspicuous Gallantry Cross—its second-highest honour—for outstanding bravery. Acting Sgt. Dipprasad Pun, 31, spent more than 400 rounds of ammo and 19 grenades in his lone-wolf battle against 30 Taliban fighters at a remote checkpoint in Helmand province. At one point, when his gun would no longer fire, he wielded it like a bat and knocked a Taliban fighter off the rooftop, shouting “Marchu talai“—”I will kill you,” in Nepali.

Jon Kopaloff/FilmMagic/GETTY IMAGES

Bachmann in overdrive
With Sarah Palin’s star apparently on the wane, get set to hear a lot more about Michelle Bachmann. The Tea Partier from Minnesota told ABC News she’s “in for 2012″—not an official declaration, but enough to whip the chattering classes into a tizzy. The darling of the far right garners a lot of attention, not all good: she’s famous for delivering a state of the union rebuttal while staring goofily into the wrong camera, declaring “not all cultures are equal,” and calling for her colleagues to be investigated to see if they are “pro-America” enough. Expect more hyperbole in months ahead as she zeroes in on Barack Obama, whom she calls the “worst president ever.”

Unlucky star
Madonna’s plan­ned $15-million Raising Malawi Academy for Girls has been scrapped amid charges of eye-popping embezzlement by its now-ousted board of directors. A damning audit showed lavish spending on offices, cars and golf memberships, but not the school, funded by Madonna and fellow Kabbalians like Gwyneth Paltrow—there isn’t even a valid land title. For Madonna the fiasco goes on: staffers are suing the pop star for wrongful dismissal and lost wages.

Where is Iman?
As though Iman al-Obeidi‘s account of a gang rape by 15 of Moammar Gadhafi‘s men after her arrest at a Tripoli checkpoint wasn’t chilling enough, she now faces criminal charges for speaking out. “The boys accused of doing this are furious,” said Libyan spokesman Moussa Ibrahim, in a nightmarish twist to the story. “They have filed a case to defend their family name.” Obeidi has been missing since being dragged off by security forces after trying to tell foreign reporters of her two-day ordeal. So far, Libya has levelled a litany of excuses, variously claiming she was drunk, “mentally ill” and a prostitute; according to her family, she’s a lawyer. They told al-Jazeera they were offered money and a house in return for her recanting her story.

The best man, for better or worse

By Jonathon Gatehouse - Monday, November 22, 2010 at 9:00 AM - 5 Comments

Prince Harry with his mother—mischievous from the start. In the military he found a real sense of purpose and belonging. | Tim Graham/Getty Images; John Stillwell/AP

If there is any justice, Prince Harry will get to organize the stag night. It wouldn’t just be his duty as presumptive best man (current odds from British bookmaker William Hill: 12-1), it would play to his proven natural talents. For of all the royals, 26-year-old Henry Charles Albert David, third in line to the throne, is the indisputable party boy.

Charles and Diana’s second son, or “the spare,” as the late princess used to teasingly call him, has long had a taste for fun, and occasionally trouble. At 16, the tabloids revealed he’d been drinking to excess down at the local pub, and smoking pot on the grounds of his father’s Highgrove estate. (The Prince of Wales reacted by dispatching him to a London drug rehabilitation clinic for one short, sharp, shocking afternoon.) At 20, he got involved in a 3 a.m. scuffle with a paparazzo outside a posh London nightclub, leaving the man with a cut lip, and a highly lucrative photo. He celebrated his 25th birthday—and the official inheritance of $14.5 million from his mother’s estate—with a $32,400 African booze cruise, on a houseboat filled with friends, lager and smokes.

“Does everyone expect me to be just the caring person and not to have a cigarette, not to have a beer?” Harry asked an interviewer who inquired about his “party prince” reputation a few years ago. “If that’s a problem with anyone, then I’m very sorry.”

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The Royal brothers in arms

By Anne Kingston - Friday, June 25, 2010 at 9:00 AM - 11 Comments

Roberto Candia/AP

This month, a cold-blooded African rock python provided the British royal family with its most heartwarming photo op in years. In a gesture that suggests relaxed regard for the future of the monarchy, the deadly reptile was draped around the necks of a smiling Prince William and a decidedly trepidatious Prince Harry during their visit to Botswana. The snake, too, was apparently nervous, urinating on the floor. Then, in a classic younger-brother moment, Harry grabbed the snake’s head and mischievously pushed it toward his older sibling as they both laughed, and camera flashes popped.

Such affectionate gestures punctuated the brothers’ African trip, their first joint overseas tour. William showed the same easy warmth and charm for which his mother Diana, Princess of Wales, was famed; Harry followed his lead, as he bonded with orphans and visited an orphanage funded by the Sentebale AIDS charity he helped found in Lesotho.

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Newsmakers

By macleans.ca - Friday, May 14, 2010 at 8:00 AM - 2 Comments

Prince Harry takes flight
The Apache attack helicopter is a nasty piece of weaponry, bristling with rockets, a 30-mm machine gun and 16 Hellfire missiles. It may soon be in the hands of a member of the British Royal Family. Last week, Prince Harry got his wings from the colonel in chief of the Army Air Corps, who happens to be his father, Prince Charles. Harry also received the Peter Adams Trophy for the student showing the best tactical ability. That, and the decision of Air Corps brass to train him on the challenging Apache—an assignment awarded the top two per cent of the class—show the army has considerable faith in the 25-year-old prince. Next up, eight months of intense training and perhaps a ticket back to Afghanistan. “There is still a huge mountain for me to climb if I am to pass the Apache training course,” he said.

Will we see less of Oprah’s fans?
The latest issue of Oprah Winfrey’s magazine, O, has Victoria dermatologist Dr. Mark Lupin’s phone ringing off the hook. Lupin is one of a handful of Canadian doctors offering the UltraShape treatment, a “non-invasive” technique that uses ultrasound waves to break up fat cells beneath the skin. UltraShape is cleared for use in 57 countries, but it has yet to receive FDA approval in the U.S. Patients feel “just a slight tingly sensation,” Lupin told O  magazine. The treated fat cells are burned as calories or eliminated from the body as waste.

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The scene at Rideau

By Aaron Wherry - Tuesday, November 10, 2009 at 11:14 AM - 16 Comments

The pool report from the meeting of Prince Charles and the Prime Minister this morning.

Their highnesses went on to meet Prime Minister Stephen Harper and his wife Laureen. They went into Rideau Hall’s large drawing room, where they stood beside four Canadian rangers wearing their red sweaters. Harper handed two ranger caps and sweatshirts to the Prince to give to his two sons.

“You highness, as you know we’re very proud of our rangers and our rangers program…a great group of people who patrol our vast arctic territory,” Harper said. “Princes William and Harry are becoming honourary members, so we present this to you as a symbol of their honourary membership.”

“I hope they fit,” quipped Prince Charles.

“One-size fits all,” interjected Laureen Harper.

Prince Charles will wear a Canadian crown

By Patricia Treble - Sunday, November 8, 2009 at 8:34 PM - 5 Comments

Prince Charles might be the longest serving heir to the throne in British, and Canadian, history but he proved on Saturday night that he can wear a crown. At British Columbia’s dinner, he donned a Coast Salish blanket and cedar headband. His wife got the same gifts, which she wore with more aplomb than her husband.

The Victoria, B.C., event came after touring the Olympic Games athletes villages in Vancouver. One could smell the irony of Charles and Camilla looking at Olympic venues that they won’t be seeing during the Games, since neither they nor the Queen have been invited. Instead of having Canada’s head of state or her heir officially open the Vancouver Olympics, Prime Minister Stephen Harper decided that Michaëlle Jean would replicate Jeanne Sauvé’s words from the 1988 Calgary Olympics. It seems that royals are only allowed to officiate at Summer Olympics in Canada. (At the Montreal Games in 1976 the whole royal family accompanied the Queen) Which is a pity, because if the Queen came, grandsons Princes William and Harry would likely have accompanied her, to the delight of screaming girls everywhere.

Charles and Camilla had a light day on Sunday—their only event was dedicating a stained glass window at Christ Church Cathedral and  commemorating the 150th anniversary of the diocese of British Columbia. On Monday, they’ll honour the 100th anniversary of the navy on Monday and then fly to Ottawa.

Newsmakers: Breakups

By Anne Kingston - Thursday, August 6, 2009 at 9:00 AM - 1 Comment

Jennifer Anniston & John Mayer
Exactly what caused the sporadic soulmates’ final fade from tabloid covers was the subject of much frenzied speculation. Was it her wanting a baby? His womanizing ways? Her eternal pining for Brad Pitt? The final consensus: the former Friends star became fed up with the schmaltzy singer’s compulsive Twittering.

Prince Harry & Chelsy Davy
Commoners learned of the breakup of the blond Zimbabwe-born law student and the ginger-haired British royal stud after five years of yacht-frolicking via that great equalizer, Facebook: Davy changed her relationship status to “not in one”—accompanied by a symbol of a broken red heart. Continue…

Newsmakers of the week

By Lianne George - Thursday, June 25, 2009 at 9:30 AM - 1 Comment

Arnold’s extra pair
In the spirit of partisan pranks-manship, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger recently sent a metal sculpture in the shape of bull testicles to California Senate President Darrell Steinberg—a metaphorical reminder of the bold budgetary decisions required by the state’s lawmakers in the face of a US$24.3-billion budget shortfall. Unfortunately, the joke fell flat. Steinberg, who is a Democrat, returned the sculpture to its sender, along with a note stressing the seriousness of the situation. In fairness to the governor, sources told MSNBC.com that the testicles were sent in response to a gag gift Steinberg sent to him—a package of mushrooms—after Schwarzenegger called the Democrat’s budget proposals “hallucinatory.” But the sculpture was apparently too much coming from a man who once called Democrats “girlie men.” When asked why so serious, Steinberg’s spokesperson told reporters, “We’ve got more important things on our plate right now than to waste any more time on such trivial matters.”

Too much information
On Monday, Canada’s Information Commissioner Robert Marleau resigned unexpectedly, only two years into an ostensible seven-year tenure. He was in the process of reforming the country’s access to information laws, which have come to be routinely subverted by secretive government officials. Only one day earlier, Marleau was quoted in a Toronto Star article decrying the whole system. When the Access to Information Act was introduced in 1983, he told the reporter, “we were amongst the leaders in the world.” Since then, he said, “It’s been the same song and dance, no effort by any government to have this legislation or these processes keep pace with time, change and technology.” The reasons for his hasty departure only 24 hours later, he told media, are “entirely personal and private.” Continue…